The Inventors Fair Lime

‘Roll up, Roll up, the inventors fair is here'.

‘Come see the miraculous, the incredible, the fan-tab-u-lous' announced the orator from his tiny wooden podium. He then leans forward and whispers to you ‘I know that fantabulous is not a word, but this is an inventors fair and if you can't invent a few words here and there, then what's the point, ay!' His moustache twitches in excitement which seems to accentuate the shiny baldness of his head.

‘Buy your tickets here' he announces to the crowd gesticulating in a strange flourish of twisting wrists towards the booth and turnstile.

‘Now good people, ladies and gentlemen, have you been acquainted with the astounding Mr Arac, who will be demonstrating his incredible Home Spider Dentistry Kit or what about Dr Faustus and his amazing security device, The Magic Void'. He pauses for effect before he continues ‘it's a new type of safe which hides your valuables inside a surprising quirk of space-time itself.' Go see him, he's at stall number 253, but then he mutters to you under his breath ‘I suggest you don't let him Magic Void your pet, last one came back a little squishy and the boys keeper was quite disgruntled.'

Suddenly you have a ticket and are through the barrier, and there before you is stall - upon stall - upon stall, this is the inventors fair. Tents and turrets are pitched everywhere, flags and banners billow as smartly suited visitors amble between the stalls. Noises fizz from displays where plumes of pink and purple smoke waft from curious contraptions to the left, right and just about everywhere.

A voting paper is then thrust into your hand and you notice it has six spaces for nominations, this is what you need to fill in and post before you exit.

You glance back and see the sun glint off the Orators shiny head as he disappears back through the gates. His wrists spin above his glistening head as he funnels and encourages more paying visitors through the turnstiles.

Now to the fair.

As you approach the stall....you see a girl peeling an orange trying to ignor her father who is running this plot .I went over to a photo boof looking thing it said on the top NO HANDS HAIR DEVISE for free.so I stepped in and closed the curtains .It looked a bit confusing but I worked it out,it said to tack your hair out so I did.it had buttons which had lots of hair styles on it like1or2plates or 1or2ponytails or curly or just brushed.i wanted curly hair so I pushed the button and I had perfect curls.i presed2pony tails then I had curly pony tails.i clicked bow but and it shown lots of different bows but I picked the rain bow one.but it stoped so I pressed it lots then it put lots of bows in my hair.

As you approach the stall you see two girls chewing the table on which their product sat. You go over quite cautiously and ask the two girls if they're okay. They say to you that they're not crazy and that the whole stall is edible. Nervously, you lick the green curtain “Hm” you say satisfied. It tasted like... you lick again. Green apple! Feeling hungry you take a bite of the table it tasted like blue raspberry.

Then the most incredible thing happened you look up. The letters on the curtains it read:SPITLES THE SWEET THAT IS ALWAYS A BLAST! All of a sudden, a drop dripped from one of the letters as quick as a flash you shot out your tongue and the drop landed on it KAPOW! A shock of sourness filled your mouth “we're the candy floss girls.” Said one of the girls

Then a huge bubble from Mr.bubble gums stall flew over picked up the whole spitles stall and flew away.So you swiftly ran to the next stall hoping the bubble won't follow.

My tent stall is an eye killing bright room with craytors in it. There are doughnuts on the wooden desk. You entered the anti gravity space room, your first invention. You jumped high

All you can see when you approach the stall is the twinkle of the amber orange lights.You can also see a small little girl sat on a crooked,wooden chair behind a large , metal table.When you walk over and get a closer look,you can see massive writing on stacks upon stacks of energy drinks.The large writing on the bottles said 'spitles drink'. After a while you could hear the little girl shouting “roll up come and get your spitles drink hear “, at the very top of her voice.

After 1 hour of people showing their inventions,the lonely,little girl had her first customer. It was a little girl who said “hmm do you have any other flavours.” The little girl replied “no”

As you approach the stall there was no stall at all it looked like a class room! There were card board walls and a door. As I walked in there were blue seats with a weird looking machine on top of the desk. It was labbled ‘The Handy Homework Helper' good job you brought my homework

There was a man who looked like a teacher, you sit down at one of the seats and take out your homework. Then you see it coming from the screen, you type in the answer which you think marks it correct.

Then the most incredible thing happens, you knowing got 12 x 12 wrong but the machine corrected it. The teacher came out from his desk and his feet looked like cornish pasties. Just kidding he had Cornish pastie slippers on ! I looked at the questions then at the machine. There was two large hols both labbled ‘Candy dispenser ‘.

You pass quite a few exhibits in the next hour, one called ‘the Big Ear' which appeared to be exactly what it said and would help you listen over great distances. They obviously hadn't invented the telephone yet!

Another stall was called the thinking machine, which listened and thought but little more. The inventor seemed embarrassed as he'd yet to invent the answer machine, which even he admitted would be far more useful.

Then finally you come across the Boot-o-matic an incredible machine which was lacing up boots on volunteers left right and centre. You sit in the chair yourself with your shoe laces undone and the tiny little machine ties them up in a flash. You are so impressed that you undo them quickly again and the Boot-O-Matic has them re done, just like that.

Of all the inventions that would save some time in the morning perhaps this was one which would in fact be truly useful. But then you notice the person getting into the chair after you with Velcro straps on his shoes and a cheeky grin on his face, I wonder how the Boot-O-Matic will deal with that!

So make a mark on your voting slip, have a chat between each other as to what you think.

Now over to the exit to meet the Orator and hand in your voting slips.

The Orator approaches, bald head glistening in the sun.

‘Place your sheets in the box and we'll see who the Inventor Supremo is in the 117th inventors fair'.

Is there one invention which is the best in your opinion? Have a discussion now and see which you think is the most impressive, when you have decided then please read on.

‘Good good.' Says the orator as you post your sheets, but suddenly there is a huge sound from the middle of the field, you look over and see a jet of blue flame snatch up into the air. A BOOM follows which is so loud you feel it in your chest, and the orators mouth drops open aghast at what is unfolding.

A flash follows with attendants and visitors running pell-mell away from the ‘Mr Bubbles, double bubble super fizz pop' tent. ‘Run for cover' they shout as people dive behind bales of straw just before the BIG explosion.

The next events seem to happen in slow motion as tents flatten across the field and flags bend horizontally away from the epicentre of Mr Bubbles. Then a black wall sweeps across towards you and there is only a moment to duck before it engulfs you. But thankfully it passes in a moment and you stand again to see the orator is covered head to foot in soot! He turns with mouth still open and moustache intact to the single flash of a reporter's camera.

‘Well it would appear that the 117th inventors fair has come to an abrupt end' he says to you with eyebrows raised as high as they will go.

The next day the local paper lands on your hall carpet with this very photograph, the orator is central, treacle black from head to foot and behind him the stately metal dome of Mr Bubbles is spurting with a mountain of foam.

The headline runs with ‘Inventor's Bubble Trouble. Hundreds flee from catastrophic fizzy pop explosion at the 117th inventors fair'.

To the left of the picture you can see yourself looking rather surprised.

What an event!


The End

What inventions would you have liked to have seen at the fair?

Are they big or small, can they be held in your hand, or carried on your back?

Is it edible, totally credible or just downright daft!

Have a talk amongst yourselves whilst the other groups catch up.